The Bertus View

King Egbert of Gonorrhea

Eggus Bertus Destructus
21 June 1968
External Services:
  • egbert@livejournal.com
  • TheEgbert

I am the Egbert, hear me roar.

0-4oblivious, happy years
5-10beginning to doubt
11-15learning to despise
16-18planning to dispose of the bodies
19-23learning to cope
24-27accepting that life is not what it's all cracked up to be
28-nowrealization that it's all good

Here is some random shit for no particular purpose:

symian - "It is said that if you are loved, you are special. To
this I must wholeheartedly agree. It has been my experience that love makes
people retarded."

sharya - “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and it may be
necessary from time to time to give a stupid or misinformed beholder a black
eye.” - Miss Piggy

heidi_13 - "I don't get enough credit for the things I manage not
to say"

symian - "Life is a bitch! She won't suck."

Now let's take a look at a few pointless pictures, shall we?

Here would be my namesake:

And here's a graph demonstrating how fast I'm shrinking:

Here's my cat (god_kitty):

And for no apparent reason, here's three iguanas fucking:

And with that, welcome to my journal.

acoustic guitar, alcohol, alcoholic beverages, ancient civilizations, animal rescue, animals, anti-censorship, anti-politically correct, arrested development, atheism, atheists, autopsies, backpacking, barenaked ladies, black and white photography, black&white photography, bob schneider, boobs, book stores, books, breasts, c, c++, camping, carbon leaf, castles, cats, childfree, childless by choice, choo-choo bear, chopping block, cleavage, coffee, colorado, colorado school of mines, comedy, comics, computer programming, computers, cooking, corpses, cynicism, darwin awards, dave barry, dead bodies, death, digital cameras, digital photography, dink, discovery channel, diving, dnrc, do-it-yourself, dvds, english comedy, erotica, evolution, family guy, fantasy, fantasy fiction, fire, free speech, girls, guitar, happy fun ball, hiking, history, human behavior, human evolution, human sexuality, humor, humour, intelligence, jon stewart, jrr tolkien, king of the hill, kittens, knowledge, laughing, learning, lingerie, logic, long walks, lord of the rings, maps, mathematics, military history, money, movies, muppets, music, naps, nature, no kidding, old photographs, open-minded people, outdoors, penny arcade, peoplewatching, phi gamma delta, philosophy, photography, port, pro-choice, programming, puns, pvp, qow, queen of wands, reading, red wine, romantic comedies, s*p, scandal sheet, sci-fi, science, science fiction, scuba, scuba diving, sex, sexuality, shiny things, simpsons, smart women, snow shoeing, snowshoeing, something positive, south park, southern rock, sunsets, technology, the royal tenenbaums, the simpsons, this is true, thunderstorms, travel, true stella awards, urban legends, war history, waterfalls, webcomics, white wine, wine, women, woodworking